Consider Me: Breaking Down the Invisible Wall

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When I was nine years old, I was a little chunky. Subsequently, I was picked on at school. My dad believed the solution was exercise. He began to teaching me to consider me.

First, my journey to exercise began with a conversation. Second, the benefits. Finally, I wouldn’t be alone in the process.

At the time, I didn’t appreciate it. The truth- my dad was the first person to introduce me to exercise—he taught me to consider me. His teaching was a lesson in self-love.

The next day dad woke me up at 6 am to exercise together. He demonstrated the exercise. Next, we’d do repetition together. Actually, we didn’t have weights. Dad and I made weights by filling empty dish soap containers with salt. My post-workout cardio was jogging—only a short distance around the block. Teaching me to consider me. Five days a week for 30 minutes. Change happened. I began to lose weight. Teased less at school.

Despite positive outcomes, I felt like I didn’t meet beauty standards. As time went on, negative self-talk held me so close. No one knew. In fact, I kept to myself. Handling it. Even though carrying the weight was hard. Tiresome. Mentally taxing. My dad’s teaching happened less often- I didn’t consider me.

After so long, I believed it. So, I built an invisible wall. Constantly thinking about what I didn’t deserve.

I was wrong. The lesson wasn’t about beauty standards. Instead, the lesson was to me first. Consider me.

Several years later, I realized my dad taught me about being the best version of myself. Starting with my health. He taught me that change is possible. But I must want it. I did! I do! Everyday! Consider me.

I want solace. Hope. Clarity. The internal and external changes. Normal lab values. All of it. That said, I consider me. I remain consistent. Guess what? Exercise became my form of self-care. Through it, I have: 

• Gained a different perspective
• Release frustration by leaving it on the mat
• Focused on me
• Put me first
• Self-love

More importantly, little by little, I’ve torn down the invisible wall. In fact, I still have work to do. Some parts of me remain closed off. I’ve only removed the first layer. I keep trying. Many times, I’ve wondered why I didn’t realize that sooner. However, that’s not essential.

WHAT’S IMPORTANT– I know now and have put it into practice.

Indeed, an AHA MOMENT.

My practice is not one size fits all. It’s tenacious. It’s hard nonetheless fair. It is by me FOR me.

Consider ME. With zeal. Will you consider yourself? Even, only for a short time.

Thanks, Dad. I love you!